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My love for art
It was my dad who was the one who put a pen in my hand as soon as I could hold one ツ He was a architect, turned interior designer who also loved doing art. He would draw and paint as hobby primarily. He would eventually have exhibitions and sell his work. He had a deep appreciation for many artists and once I was in my teens, we would spend hours pouring over book and discuss all kinds of art work: from the old masters to modern artists.
While I was still very little, my dad would take me with him when he went to sit somewhere in nature to draw. I’d have my own little drawing pad and doodled while he would create his pieces of landscapes, flowers and more. I loved these times and it instilled in me a love for creating art for joy and fun. These moments were my time with dad, my time to learn from him and enjoy creating pictures. I’d often gift my creations as presents to my wider family and loved the comments of how I was like my dad ツ I was very proud to be likened to him and have my drawings compared to his talent.
art teachers
And the typical story of many is true for me too – at school, I was doodling during most lessons, filling pages upon pages with scribbles and lettering while I was supposed to pay attention. And I had a love/hate relationship with my art teachers.
My art lessons were by no means horrible – I had a great education and very good teachers. They taught me much about all the different techniques and guided my practice. Depending on my age or maturity though, I chose to rebel against much and would be marked down in return. All the arguments and conversations did push me and in hindsight, of course, they pushed me to practice and work hard and do better. For my final 2 years, I chose art (and English) as my main subjects and considered going to art school after finishing school. That’s how much I loved art.
the world of fine art
After my abitur (the equivalent of the A levels) I planned to apply to art school. Beforehand, I was planning a year out — but before setting off to Canada, I went to explore my options and attended some open days at nearby art schools. I had an impression of how elitist the fine arts can be by attending exhibitions and art classes and I was not sure whether I would fit. I understood art to be a formidable discipline, one that is based on craft and allow self-expression, as well as making political statements. I did not however understand much of the modern art movements that would put an every day object into a box and call it a statement. But I was ready to learn and understand more and attend art school.
What happened next was to change my thinking though. I went to an open day, and then sat outside in the sunshine for lunch to read through brochures and options, considering how I could best prepare a fitting portfolio for my application. I sat there, not realising that the bench was outside the window of one of the art rooms. There was a group of the art lecturers discussing submitted portfolios. I overheard their conversations and I did not initially think much of it. But as I could hear them so clearly, I curiously listened in, thinking I might be able to conclude some pointers, something that could help me prepare for my portfolio submission.
However, it soon became utterly horrible… their attitude was arrogant. Dismissive. They barely even looked at some of these portfolios. As this was a mere conincident that I was there and overheard, I did not have any expectations. But as their conversation progressed, I thought that it would have to be expected that they would be critical and assess carefully whether an applicant deserved a space on their courses. I was quite shocked how quickly they went through so many portfolios, how little time they took to even consider the work included.
It was clear that they didn’t even look at some of the portfolios at all and literally judged them by the case the work was submitted in ~ how horrible, how wrong… Of course, I did not see what they were looking at – but their tone, their superior attitude made me think about what kind of teaching they’d deliver. While I did have my own little battles with my teachers, they would not speak to me with such arrogance, did not make me feel like art was something only the chosen ones could reach.
The conversations I overheard reminded me of this elitist aspect of the art world. Of what I disliked a lot. The thought of having to adjust to this kind of attitude and self-serving arrogance in order to be a successful artist made me doubt my desire to get into art as a profession. My views would collide with this pretentious, elitist world and I decided to take my year out and reconsider.
After a year away, I changed my path – and a few years later, I discovered my love for design. I never regretted my decision not to make art my direction for work. I realised that I was happier being creative to produce work that is for people. It has inherent meaning in its purpose – is something that can be tested and improved and ultimately have an impact beyond its aesthetic value. Graphic design, first analog then digital, led to web design and I absolutely love creating work that can make a difference. The open web and it’s wonderful community allowed me to grow as a creative.
art as escapism
Art remained in my life, all depending on time of course. I loved taking on projects that would allow me to be a little more artistic and I was lucky to work on posters, flyers and album covers for bands who would encourage me to just run with their ideas and let loose. It was this freedom that led me to working with Flash in my early days of web design before learning coding.
As learning web design, the web standards way, including both design and coding was quite a challenge for me, I did not have as much time for art as I would have liked to. Still doodling and doing bits and pieces, it took me a while to get back to it properly. This time for joy and fun, as an escape from the requirements of design. And here we are…
When I realised (again) how much art means to me, how much I enjoy just playing with colour – I knew that I would have to make an effort to keep doing it. I found Krita and was soon hooked again. I decided to make a pact with myself: to keep creating but also to share the work I produce as a means of making my process somewhat structured.
I’d recently joined Mastodon, an instance for art, to look at creative pieces by the many talents out there. I thought one way of joining and contributing to my new ‘tribe’ ツ was to share what I create. I decided to shut up that inner critic by posting every single piece online and to share it on mastodon.art immediately too – not give myself the time or opportunity to critically view or judge my pieces.
I set up the first version of this website – and I will keep adding all my pieces to that section. I will chose pieces for themed collection to feature on the main site, selecting them by my own preference or by those most popular on mastodon.art.